Acceptance. . .
We often ignore what we don’t want to see or what we wish to see differently. We devote a lot of time to denying what is. Consequently, so much energy is wasted by resisting something that cannot be changed in the first place, and suffering ensues. If we stop resisting and accept what is, we can stop additional suffering and pain.
It’s important to note that you do not have to like, want, or support whatever it is that you’re accepting. Acceptance starts with perceiving reality as it is right now: what people are rather than what you want them to be, situations that you cannot control. Acknowledge what is present and what is, but know it is not necessarily finite. Acceptance is an active process. It doesn’t mean that you can’t work on changing things and that what you’re accepting will be that way forever. But by struggling against reality—resisting and rejecting it—we create unnecessary additional suffering and pain.
Here are four tips on learning acceptance, letting go, and reducing your suffering:
Be patient with yourself. Be curious and open to learning. Observe what your patterns are and notice what’s happening. How are you feeling? What emotions come up?
Use mindfulness. The goal is NOT to get rid of these internal states or emotions that you observe, but to understand them and their root causes. When these states or emotions arise, even unpleasant ones, try to welcome them and appreciate that they are a necessary part of being a human being who has a range of emotions in response to an experience. Let them be as they are. Create a more friendly, acceptance-based relationship with your internal states.
Peace and Love, Jim