Four questions. . .
From the day you are born, everything you do was done because you wanted something.
That is a true statement when we look at motivation and empowerment. There is no motivation if there is no reward (even if it is only self-satisfaction), and no reason for empowerment if there is no reason to need that power. From inventing the light bulb to taking a bath, if we are going to take self-initiative there has to be a belief that the actions, if accomplished, will serve a purpose towards a goal.
Our brain is so efficient that we may not even recognize that we have asked if the job could be accomplished, and if it was accomplished would it serve the purposes we want it to serve. Nevertheless, the last problem your mind must assess is the value of the goal.
Is it worth it?
This question is qualitative, evaluating whether we SHOULD do the job. For most adults this is a cost versus benefit analysis. “Will the effort put forth return enough dividends to make everything worth the investment?” It is my opinion that this is where many adults have difficulty, because it requires an understanding of what you want in the world. Sometimes, the choices of which goal to peruse are too close to call. Regardless, if we understand how our mind is motivated and empowered, we can often use that insight to see where and why we are and aren’t about any aspect of our lives. It is then we can determine if we will or will not make the changes to increase our motivation, and thus empower ourselves to accomplish. There are four aspects to think on:
Will I do the job?
Is it worth it?
I have not provided definitions are answers to these because we tend to go on auto pilot with these concepts, we think we know already or its just not required, but TAKE A MINUTE and review them, the use them in your own life. There is almost always some aspect of our lives that we are saying we “should do” but end up not doing; or worse, doing the opposite. We then chastise ourselves for being human and having no will power or ability.
My suggestion is to change the inner dialogue. Practice replacing the “should” statements into “shall” statements. The word shall means to express intent. We intend to do that. This is an action not a desire. It is a verbal (even if it is an internal dialogue) contract with yourself. When you change “I should do laundry” to “I shall do laundry” there is a measurable difference of experience in the brain. When we make contracts with others and ourselves we are much more likely to follow through with the plan.
Peace and Love, Jim